I am angry. What makes me angry? Answer is “Different non-acceptable situations in life“. We all know what anger is, and we’ve all felt it as a part of the life.
Anger is a completely normal human emotion, infact it’s healthy! But when it gets out of control and runs on the unwanted destructive track, it can lead to hell lot of problems like problems at work, in your personal relationships, and in the overall quality of your life.
Sometimes, we want life to behave as we expect and when it doesn’t, anger comes into play its part. Why is it so? Because something is not going the way we want. Expectations play a vital role in the origin of anger.
The natural way to express anger is to respond aggressively. Anger is a natural, adaptive response to threats. It inspires powerful, often aggressive, feelings and behaviors, which allow us to fight and to defend ourselves when we are attacked. For our survival, a certain amount of anger is necessary, Yes! But that doesn’t mean we take it for granted and show anger in every situation of life! :P
Laws and Common sense place limits on how far our anger can take us. Take a example of a Software Developer: If a developer is writing a program and it is not getting executed. He is pissed off and in anger, he passes irritation to break the screen. What’s the bloody point in doing that? ( This is very rare case though :D ). He don’t know that the error is in his mind and not the computer application! What he writes, computer responds accordingly! He should understand the problem by keeping his head cool and take the necessary action accordingly.
Anger is a natural way to say that something is not well in your life. However, when this feeling is unchecked or unresolved, it can cause very hazardous consequences for a person who holds the anger in him or her. Most people understand the logic behind anger, but when it gets over to them, rationalities and logic are among the first casualties.
You must have played angry birds, right? See, even if they are angry, we can control them. haha! ;) Keep this control on yourself and it will definitely help you. Please make sure that Anger is the third party tool whereas peace is the official Application which comes in the package. Utilize it to the fullest ;)
There are some tips I want to give which might be useful to you. I just try these tips and found these really helpful. Check them out:
Go to Temple or some peaceful place
When I am angry, I walk to the temple or some peaceful place where I can have peace.
Take a timeout
1) Before reacting to a tense situation, take a few moments to breathe deeply and count to 10. Slowing down can help defuse your temper.
2) If necessary, take a break from the person you are angry with or with the situation until your frustration subsides a bit.
Think before you speak
In the heat of the anger moment, it’s easy to say something you’ll later regret. You will feel ashamed of yourself later. So, don’t take any important action in the moment. Take a few moments to collect your thoughts before saying anything — and allow other who are involved in the dispute to do the same. Talk to them after a much needed break.
Once you’re calm, express your anger
Once you have collected your thoughts about the reason for the dispute, express your frustration in an assertive but nonconfrontational way. State your concerns, needs directly without hurting the other person.
Workout is the outlet for your emotions expecially if you’re about to erupt. If you feel your anger escalating a bit, go for a walk or run, or spend some time doing other favorite physical activities. They can leave you feeling happier and more relaxed.
I do meditation daily. It’s been helping me a lot. I find it a very good suggestion for the anger control.
This topic is really vast and I am not the expert in it as I get angry very soon these days. When I get angry, I *really* get angry. I try not to speak when I am involved in the heat moment otherwise it results in a worst result anyone could ever get. So, I am just a beginner in this control theory. Just sharing what I felt and I hope it helps you and you could get to peace soon!
Signing Off with a Peace, Cheers! :)